Got to show off my wonderful face
My life as far as I know has just taken a U-turn right when everything was going great. Now I feel alone and stressed 24/7 and I’m supposed to be stress free this summer break after such a shitty past couple years. My life has been so bipolar I don’t even know what I want anymore. My main goal in life is to be happy but I don’t know how I can even do that anymore. I just want things to be the way they were but that’s too far gone now and it kills me to know that. Family is shit and friends are probably sick of me. I don’t do anything to meet people and I’ve built up a reputation as a bitter asshole and as much as I would like that not to be true it is. When everything was perfect I was on top of the world and had one of the largest egos but now that I can’t even bring myself to get up in the morning most days it just beats me down even more. Whatever though, I guess this is my shitty life for now.
So its been nearly two months since everything fucked up.
Everything was perfect, we were all getting along and I was having a great time doing everything I wanted but you had to fucking change that. I had plans that were going to make this year great and your arrogance has changed that. You couldn’t have just held it out? You couldn’t have been the bigger person?
The fact that you’re looking at selling a car instead of getting a job disgusts me. To think I used to respect you and I thought you were the greatest man in the world. You keep shit from us and you think it doesn’t matter. You think at 51 you can change your life around but let me fucking tell you. You can’t completely change it, you want to do things you have no idea how they even work.
I can’t wait to leave here. I really just want to find a rich old man and leave with him. The fact that things are becoming so unbearable here that the idea of just leaving is pure ecstasy.
I just want to be happy again.